Guys, my cousin is basically perfect in every way and she made me this engagement video with a collage and video of the proposal!! The sweetest and most amazing thing I have ever seen.

I am not worthy of all of this, I really am not.

So I made this for my incredible cousin. Because she’s basically my sister (not literally- we’re not THAT hillbilly). And also, my family likes her fiance so much that we had to get him to marry someone in the family…

12 notes

I love that I’m basically the most amazing person at interviews. 

I hate that people falsely advertise jobs though. So help me. If I go to another interview for a position and they tell me “Oh, about full time… we just changed it to part-time” or “Yeah, the pay is minimum wage with the responsibility of upper management” or “When we said we provided full benefits we meant that you would pay 75% of it” I am going to flip my shit.

I know the job market isn’t ideal. But I’m a 30 year old woman who is educated, has a degree and has pretty substantial experience in the most random mix of jobs. Not to mention, when I get a job, I stay with it. For, like, ever. Until the job no longer exists. How is it this hard!? SERIOUSLY. Things like car payments, rent, utilities, insurance, health insurance and basic cost of living are ridiculous. Life is ridiculous. I’m overwhelmed. I’m not unhappy or miserable. I’m just overwhelmed. And impatient. And getting very tired from spending 10+ hours a day job searching. DUMB DUMB DUMB.

That said. It can be FUNemployment. I have seen amazing people I haven’t seen in a while. I’ve cleaned a lot (which makes me happy), I’ve helped plan the most adorable proposal ever and I’ve gotten alone time which I never get. Not all is lost.

5 notes





#give me a job

Sometimes I wish it were as easy as falling asleep and just never waking up. Of course, that would mean I would have to actually sleep for a solid amount of time which will never fucking happen apparently. Still… it would just be easier. 

1 note

#i give up

You have no right to scold me or judge my behavior. It’s so easy for you to forget how this feels, right? Right. The last thing I need is judgement. From you. 

It’s funny… I went from being very grateful for having incredible friends to realizing rather quick I have maybe 5% of the friends I thought I had. I guess that when the times get tough for other people, I’m expected to be there. But it’s too much to ask for them to return the favor. 

I guess it’s better to know now than find out later, right? Plus, it makes moving far away that much easier. There’s less and less reasons for me to stay here.

If you’re so “worried” about me, maybe fucking call. You know, as opposed to talking to other people about your concern.

If you fucking cared, maybe talk to me so you know everything. Rather than assume. Go fuck yourself. I’m fucking fine and the last thing I need is you.


My boyfriend’s choice in terrible fucking movies make me want to drink vodka that much faster. 

1 note

#please black me out


I’m a man….and I can change…if I have to…..I guess

The Possum Lodge, Red Green Show (via tw33t3r)

lol. If you have to? Or if a woman TELLS you to? ;-)

(via wildchiver)

30 notes


My period app says I’m 8 days away from my period but my body says its coming tonight

I feel your pain man. 

4 notes

How much vodka is in here and how much water is in here?

How much vodka is in here and how much water is in here?

2 notes

#if you said 100% vodka you are correct

#fuck this

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